Love Potion Number Nine


I took my troubles down to Madam Ruth.
You know, that gypsy with the gold capped tooth.
She’s got a pad down at Thirty-fourth and Vine,
Sellin’ little bottles of Love Potion Number Nine.

I told her that I was a flop with chicks.
I been this way since nineteen fifty-six.
She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign.
She said, “What you need is Lve Potion Number Nine.”

She bent down and turned around
And gave me a wink.
She said, “I’m gonna mix it up
Right here in the sink.”
It smelled like turpentine
And looked like India ink.
I held my nose,
I closed my eyes,
I took a drink.

I didn’t know if it was day or night.
I started kissing ev’rything in sight.
But when I kissed the cop at Thirty-fourth and Vine,
He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine.

She bent down and turned around
And gave me a wink.
She said, “I’m gonna mix it up
Right here in the sink.”
It smelled like turpentine
And looked like India ink.
I held my nose,
I closed my eyes,
I took a drink.

I didn’t know if it was day or night.
I started kissing ev’rything in sight.
But when I kissed the cop at Thirty-fourth and Vine,
He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine.

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